Onyx Bunny guide
Beginner's guide to restraint
Start soft, keep a release within reach, and make stopping easy.
Agree on the scene
Restraint changes how control feels, so consent needs to be specific. Talk while everyone is fully clear-headed. Name which body areas are welcome, what will stay off-limits, how long you want to try, and what mood you want—playful, slow, or structured. Decide on a stop word and a nonverbal signal in case speaking becomes difficult. Consent to being held is not consent to anything else.
Choose forgiving gear
Wide padded cuffs are easier to position and release than narrow cord. A soft tie can work for light holding when it stays flat and loose, but never use a tightening or sliding knot. Keep safety scissors nearby for fabric, and learn every buckle or quick-release before the scene. Avoid the neck and never leave a restrained person alone. The goal is a clear sensation of holding, not maximum tightness.
Protect movement and circulation
Leave enough room to slide two fingers under a cuff. Keep joints in a natural position, with no body weight pressing on restrained wrists or ankles. Check frequently for numbness, tingling, unusual cold, color change, or pain; release immediately if any appears. For a first try, keep hands in front and choose one point of restraint. Simple positions are easier to monitor and just as effective for building anticipation.
Release and reconnect
End before either person is exhausted. Release slowly, support stiff limbs, and offer water, warmth, and unhurried closeness. Marks, dizziness, or persistent discomfort mean the activity should stop and be assessed with appropriate help if needed. When both people feel settled, ask what felt secure, what felt uncertain, and what should change. Store cuffs open and inspect stitching and hardware before the next use. A calm ending is part of the scene.